Monday, January 3, 2011

WHY WE HAVE THE FRIENDS WE HAVE....

There are no 'accidental friendships.' There are no 'accidental relationships' of any kind. It's all the Law of Attraction at work.... on both sides.
I really DO appreciate my friends... I think of the wide variances of my own friends and therefore call them my "Motley Crue" Nerd Some of you will remember that band.
Some of you might stand a better chance of remembering this schmaltzy little Email forward penned by an anonymous author. It was entitled "Friends for a Reason, A Season, or a Lifetime." Aristotle wrote at length about friendship and he, too, said there were three categories of friendship, made for the purpose of 1) utility, --those who are of benefit to us; 2) pleasure, which included those things from passionate love affairs to fishing buddies; and 3) those 'of good,' in which friends would always seek out the good in the other -- comparable to 'lifetime' in the modern version. I prefer the simplicity of the modern version. As with all of the great philosophers, Aristotle tended to word it to death, although there are definite similarities to his modern day counterpart. I believe it is possible for all three descriptions to blend and intertwine in many of our relationships.
_Reason_: Friends for a reason. To me, this is the one I see as most highly based on the Law of Attraction. Opposites only appear to attract. One is simply doing a better job of hiding certain qualities, letting the other expose those qualities openly.
We draw or magnetize certain people into our lives because they DO seem to confirm us and our belief systems. They also mirror what we do NOT like about ourselves. That makes us want to go 'huh-uh' 'no sirree'...'no way, Jose' ' ... but in our non-defensive and non-guarded moments we can 'see' what we prefer not to see. Usually, this comes as an indicator that there is an area in our life we need to 'clean up.'
The opposite can be true. We can see in some of our friends what we like seeing in ourselves. Our "Reason" friends are most likely to me the ones with whom we share many basic beliefs. C.S. Lewis once said that often instant friendships were born when one tells the other: "Oh, I thought I was the only one who thought that way!"
__Season__: Friends for a Season: These are friends who come into our lives for a short time...perhaps only several years...maybe even for a few days. But, we have made a real 'connection.' Some teachers have told us: You can feel a powerful recognition of someone -- like sitting on the same bench at a bus stop, or in the aisle of a supermarket... that you may never see again; but perhaps he or she was a good friend in a different life, and its just a way of saying 'hello.'
Sometimes short term friends can prove to be very valuable teachers ... or of some needed comfort...or guides or angels taking human form that somehow serve us with a very important purpose. Barb Marciniak's Pleiadians have told us that in this very important and pivotal lifetime, we will somehow, in some way, connect with all friends (or family) that have been most important to us in all our lifetimes. Sometimes we might even recognize each other as such.
__Lifetime__: We have comparatively few 'lifetime' friends during one lifetime --the friends we have known since childhood. An exception, I believe, could be family groupings that we have recarnated with many times become Lifetime friends (or family.) It is always our choice, in between lifetimes, if we want to stay with the same groups or branch out and try something different for a different type of growth and expansion. Lifetime friends probably know us best of all. I like this definition of a friend: "Someone who knows all your faults and worst secrets and still likes you." As romantic as it sounds, I disagree with the premise that a person just has 'one soul mate.' We can become obsessively attached to the idea that NO ONE could possibly take this person's place and we could never love some one as much as this particular person. Here again, is where, to me, Buddhism explains things very well. This is Grasping and Attachment (cause of suffering) ...and therefore very limiting to the total Soul we really are. We will never 'lose touch' with all those we know and love... but they are not 'the only ones' we dearly love...hard as that may be to conceive of. We can also play different roles for each other in various lifetimes...just for the experience and expanding points of view. Its all about expansion and growth. Careful not to think of 'karma' as _punishment_...that is a very suffocating, limiting, false concept.

Sometimes friends drop out of our lives for various reasons, not the least of which can be that either they...or us...have decided that no more contact is better for us. But as Abraham says: All relationships are forever... the person you now want no more to do with is someone who might likely be a good buddy on 'the other side.' You don't have to 'put up with' anyone...but you best wish them well -- not for their sake -- but you own. Otherwise you will draw yet another person into your life who may look and sound different ... but will be amazingly similar to the one you dropped. So -- we owe it to ourselves to ask "What does this teach me?...What have I learned?"
After all, "I" the one that attracted that person into "my" life. Those of us who know we Create Our Own Reality, realize that we cannot continue to play The Blame Game' for any length of time. That keeps us from being free of the situation...which will be repeated until 'we catch on.' I do not at all mean to imply that we ARE, at times, much better off without certain people in our lives ... We just have to 'see things' from a much deeper and more perceptual point of view. There are NO such things as true victims. (although that is a very appalling concept for some people...)
As Creators...like Seth has told us ... we have chosen to play both on what we call The Dark Side and the Light Side... and to experience it ALL...because we are a part of All That Is.
There, are times, though, we have all most likely questioned what kind of heavenly nectar we were imbibing when we outlined the blueprints for our lifetimes. Nerd

Namaste'
Prayer