Saturday, August 27, 2011

When Some People Really "Get To You"..!!

It's hard. We know it is. We may want to act all cool and unaffected, but more often then not -- we really feel deeply the emotions of anger, hurt, or disgust -- when we let people "get to us." A Facebook friend posted the funniest comment the other day: "If you know of someone who is still alive simply because you did not want to go to prison--please repost this." (thank you, Phillip!) I love dark humor. The people that DO -- can relate to a style of wit that escapes the more literal chaps.
Most of the time we can just sluff off some of the remarks people make. I say most of the time, because I believe its true. If we are wise, we learn to avoid people who seem to be perpetually obnoxious, insulting, insensitive, or rude. No, we are not being spiritually superior in any way for putting up with people who are jerks. People who 'put up with' barrages of insolence are not 'tolerant' and admirably patient...They are dishonoring themselves and lacking in self-confidence and esteem. People who continuously subject themselves to mental sado-masochism are not loving, tolerant, and fore bearing ... they are in need of help.

I've often said its one thing to say: "Everybody has a right to their opinion"...but it's not all that easy to be gracious to those people who think they have a right of actually express those opinions. Rolling Eyes Especially when their opinions come from blatant prejudice, judgment, self-righteousness, and obvious ignorance of the subject of which they are speaking.
When to speak.... When to be silent.... How does one deal with the pain of emotions that suddenly seem to overtake you when someone makes a hurtful or anger-provoking remark?
I have been known, at times, when I engaged my mouth prior to switching on my brain, to blame it on my genetic heritage. Irish, you know. Just can't help it. Confused
However, I would still end up 'paying the piper' in spite of the no-fault-Irish-excuse. In all seriousness (mostly) however, it's very much of an individual thing as to when a person decides to speak up: "I have to stand up for what I believe"... and simply Letting It Be. That is hardly up to me to judge. If we are honest with ourselves -- we know that it can be very difficult to remain silent rather than come up with a very hurtful retort. We also know (way deep down inside) that just because we h really thought up a 'good comeback' and slammed someone down and 'put them in their place' ... it really doesn't feel all that good. Maybe for a few seconds...but that's about it. That little voice tells us it was all about Ego. Ego wants to win. Ego needs attention. Ego is NEVER satisfied...the more we feed it, the more it wants... Then, one day, we Wake Up and inwardly 'sees' what we are doing. If, after that, we continue to choose to 'get even' and retaliate against the other person...then we cannot escape admitting to ourselves, without excuses, that we purposely wanted to inflict pain on another person. So who wins? No one. We know it...we feel it in our soul...

That typifies that horrible saying: "I don't get mad -- I get even." You might say that when we have 'lost it' it means we have "lost our connection to Source." And that does NOT feel all...ever.
So when someone 'gets to you' still have a choice as to how you will react. Always. But what about the 'yeah buts'--and-- 'how come then when' etc etc -- and ALL those excuses we use when we feel truly 'justified' in hurting back??

Here is what we don't particularly want to hear: The Law of Attraction. It's always at work, always dishing out to us something that will match the vibrations that are contained within us. LOA is not judging. Its only magnetizing. Very impersonally. And boy oh boy, can that be hard to swallow! Cool If we ALLOW it, however, we can always -- always -- learn something from these painful situations that helps us to grow, expand, and be more allowing. And THEN!!-- Truly Feel Better!! We can't just say: "If I have learned one thing, it's to avoid assholes." Nope. Sorry. That isn't always the The Final Answer. That's only the ego taking the easy way out. Inwardly, we 'know' what the answer is for us.

Yesterday I nearly 'lost it' with another resident here. I was ready to put on my Crusader Cape (those capes usually sparkle with a good sprinkling of self-righteousness) and tell this guy off good! And, I was going to do this in front of others! He had hurt a friend of mine in a very bad way. So I was going to do the same to him, by gum! I would share what it was -- but I don't need or want validation that "I was justified." What I was totally overlooking was this: My friend attracted this incident to him. I wasn't even present when it occurred. The 'offender' had never offended me in any way. Ever. No, I didn't have to like the cruel things he said to my friend... but it was not my problem. Now... that may raise some hackles on some of your backs, because my 'reasoning' doesn't exactly reflect a Hallmark movie. BUT.... I am so glad that I kept my mouth shut. My friend is a 'full grown' adult who has to learn his own lessons without my 'help'...otherwise known as interference. It didn't take me long to start remember how my friend literally 'asks' (attracts) for trouble fairly often.. This is just one very minute example on the subject of 'getting to you.' I was SO glad I cooled my jets.
It doesn't pay for us to make up a long list of all the 'possible' or 'probable' times when we just knew for sure we would most likely be praised and lauded for playing the Caped Crusader! So convinced we are "right!" But -- it still chalks up the points for the EGO... and 'winning' does NOT solve the problem that created it.
In his wonderful little book "The Four Agreements" Don Miguel Ruiz, in the 3rd Agreement says: "Don't Take It Personally" ... whether it is directed at you...or a loved one...or anyone else. Let it STAY with the other person. Don't take it in. That is the perspective we need to aim for. It doesn't mean we can't ever speak our own truths or give our own positions. But let's be honest here. We KNOW _when_ to do this...and _how_ to do this.
And if we haven't learned that yet...Well...we will eventually learn...or we'll keep hurting until we do. That's just the way Life is. Always helping us to grow...and teaching us to be more allowing...We then learn to tend to our own doorsteps...and we learn to: just Let It Be.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

DARE TO BE DIFFERENT!! ...if you dare...(Perhaps dye your hair blue...)

Have you ever noticed how freaked out some people get when they see a person with wildly colored, blue...purple, etc.. I overhear quite a few derogatory remarks like this fairly often-- beings I live in a senior building. There is a man who comes here to visit his mother. He usually sports very blue hair. Thus, he has acquired many labels from our residents: insane, unintelligent, disrespectful, disgraceful, and impudent. However, younger people are not always exempt from this kind of judgement.
I believe that everything stems and flows from one of two sources: One is Love. The other is Fear. Malice, prejudice, or any kind of non-loving actions are usually attributed to ignorance and hatred... but the root source is still Fear. So many people are SO afraid of anything that is different. It frightens them. Fear, then, results in self-defensiveness and promotes judgment and condemnation. The reasons for these reactions most often (although not always) can be traced to how 'we were taught to think' by all of authority figures. These 'teachings' are multi-generational and their effects can be seen all over the globe resulting in divisions, sub-divisions, cultures and sub-cultures, etc etc etc... We were and still are immersed in 'them' vs 'us'... "Everyone has a right to their own opinion" is seldom (audibly) followed by "even if you are totally wrong" but it seems to make the say-er appear both politically and spiritually correct. I am not promoting "we should all think alike"...Hardly. That is all too viral already. What I mean to forward is the idea that yes, we all DO have the 'right' to think as we please and have our own opinions...but (and this is a big but Nerd ) we each have to0 learn to sport our OWN 'blue hair' in ways that allow us to emerge from a type of mass consciousness that promotes the idea that we must get approval from -- or take our validation from 'others' who make up this mass consciousness. We can and should wear our blue hair with peaceful intent. Never with intent of purposeful confrontation, violence or harm to others. Harmful action is always deeply fear based.
I strongly agree with the Pleiadians prediction that this indeed is the time of a great battle for our MINDS. To own one's own mind is key too self-empowerment. I believe that the majority of people who are so programmed and mind-controlled, have no idea that they are and would be the first to argue with you. These are 'nice, normal' everyday people. We like them. They mean well. They are not 'bad'...just not Awake. MCP (Mind-Controlled, Programmed)people read newspapers from 'cover to cover' as they say, to 'be informed.' They believe everything they hear on the 'news' via TV or radio. They 'believe in' all organizations that have initials: The: FBI, CIA, USDA, FDA, AMA, the dreaded IRS, etc... as well as all 'organizations' that claim to promote health, wealth, prosperity and happiness. Reducing these organizations to initials gives them the added power of 'symbolism' which promotes more emotion than the frequencies of 'words.' They would never question their own brand of religion (although obviously 'the others' are 'wrong') What is promoted via television can be far more dangerous to the mind and body than any street drug. TV 'programs' shape 'morality,' mode and style of 'thinking, and creates 'mood settings' which extend and last far beyond the half or full hour of programming. Drug advertisements promote more fear than horror flicks and keep your allegiance to the AMA and Big Pharma alive and well....if you'll pardon the pun. The mix of TV frequencies, (both sound and visual) symbols and colors are constantly impressing and embedding both fear and dependency -- even though false promises of happiness, freedom, and relief are the 'hooks.' The Internet has as much potential for this same type of exposure. The main difference is that the 'interactive' aspect of the Internet tends to promote more thinking along with discernment and discretion. We have marvelous technology. In and of itself it is not 'bad'...but the potential each technological device possesses for 'good' or 'bad' is always equal to that potential. Much of the advanced technology already developed is never advertised. There exists no such thing as 'privacy.' Trust me on that one. If a person's spiritual development is not equal to the potential of any technical can be very detrimental.
I have never witnessed a time when the world has been more divided. Government does not unite... It divides...on purpose. Our two party system is its greatest tool for creating derision, division, fear, and hatred. With those qualities well instilled into the mind, we are easily controlled... We 'align with and find our strength in people who AGREE with us'... The Crypts and the Bloods will have to go some distance to keep up with the hatred and blame fostered by the Republicans and Democrats.
Does anyone with two operable brain cells actually buy into the Game that was just played out in Congress?!!? Think of all the Fear, animosity, and blame that was generated (yes, created on purpose) by this event. I guess I would have to call that a success. Rolling Eyes Giving the devil his due, as the old saying goes...
As a race, much of humanity still finds "war" justifiable and necessary...and thinks of it as a 'necessary' action. And of course, using "God" and the sanctity of borders (aka countries) as pious reasons --to disagree would be blasphemy. Gee, which is worse: a guy with blue hair or a man who refuses to go to war? I am sure the irony of this question might escape many.
Never have two more powerful words been uttered than: QUESTION AUTHORITY!! ... "NO FEAR...Absolutely NO FEAR" rubs people the wrong way because they have SO little faith in the inate goodness of man that they believe fear (and a zillion laws!) are the answer to "Peace." This is also a very strong form of control. Recently someone coined "Some people work for a living and others vote for a living." That has some truth in it. I'll vote you in, you fight my battles for me and 'gimme stuff.' But to dare Question Authority, be it governmental, religious, or societal -- is a bit too much to ask of many. Don't make waves. Play it safe. Make sure you are validated and approved of. Live up to what others expect of you. Play the game. Agree with what costs you the least mental conflict. Stay in the box. Play it 'cool.' Turn on your TV and watch the News and be 'informed.'
I probably shouldn't add more controversy to what I've already "AND!--you create your own reality!!" The only way anything will change is to change your thoughts, make sure what action you take is motivated by Love, your Highest Good and the Highest Good of others. Be the change you want to see. Don't expect any president or politician or religion or school or law or Who or Whatever to do it for you or think any of that will get you what you really want. (gasp!--really?)... Nah...that would be going too far... Nerd
Namaste' Prayer